So I’ve been learning lately that hard work is hard. What seems so achievable when you’re watching What Not to Wear marathons in May, isn’t as easy in the trenches. I was convinced at the beginning of the summer that I was mechanical, that my spiritual gift was robotic focus. I have learned how truly human I am, and am at long last ready to admit that I am over extended.
I was overwhelmed this summer between my three jobs and summer college from the get go, but at first it was more fun. Now as I’m wrapping it up, I feel adult in a not so fun way. I feel my first taste of burnout and utter exhaustion.
Do I regret this? No. God helped me make the choices I made for my summer. Such soul changing, perspective molding good has happened to my heart in the long drives and longer hours. Many truths have come at my heart in the Still Small Voice.
Truth has come through my students’ innocence, my fiancé’s understanding, and my family’s softness. But my favorite of my lessons? How vitally important the small kindnesses are. It truly is the little things that make life worth living.
When I just cannot get off the entrance ramp and I’m already late for work, one woman stopped her car to a halt and waved me over. I remember her face perfectly because I loved her in that moment.
When my students are wound up and hopping and one sits still. Criss-cross applesauce and wise beyond her years. I feel my work is doing good in her.
When I am so so tired. And so so broke, and a friend buys my coffee. I was so deeply thankful.
When I cancel plans to take more hours and my friends/family/sisters/fiancé smile warmly and send verses and love on me. I know how blessed I am to know them.
The example of the wonderful people God sent down my path to lighten my load one critical pound at time have changed me.
I stop and let strangers on the highway, waving with a smile. I empty my change into a needy hand, and don’t judge too hard in my heart. I clean the kitchen without excuses or needing praise. I give such small presents because I know now that they matter. I hold hands, hug a little longer, and listen without touching my cell phone.
I would like to love as I have been loved. It is my calling right now. To do what I can and do it happily. Love is the cheapest, purest, hardest, and most godly gift that any person can give. Of this I am sure.
“Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.”
– Mother Teresa
Welcome! I'm a wife, mama-to-be, foster mom, fourth year music teacher, and Jesus follower, and am chronically curious about just about everything. Join me as I explore the calling God has for my family's story.
"I am the Vine, you are the Branches. If you abide in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing."